Damn Swede

I don’t know what is wrong with me today.  I woke up fairly early, did some cleaning and then laid down for a nap.  As I was trying to relax I realized I couldn’t.  It has been several weeks since I have been home on the weekend and for that reason I feel behind.  Behind on what I am not sure.

I did spend the afternoon cleaning out my file cabinet, throwing away and filing all my old papers.  It feels good to have that finished; it has been on my list of things to do for weeks.  I also need to do about five minutes of work.  Maybe I should do that now.

Good news!  I am getting a significant amount as a tax refund.  It is enough to pay off my credit card debt and put a chunk in savings.  I am very excited!

It’s over.

My office has shut it’s doors in the River North neighborhood, in exchange for someplace in the loop. I am not yet sure how to get there. The good news is that they let us go at about 2:30 today; at which time we did what every good agency would do with an early release. We went to the bar.

On my way out of the bathroom at the bar, I realized that I really like the people I work with. Yeah, I knew that before, but I felt a sense of sadness about it because I think I might have a job offer within the next week. I am going to miss them for sure.

I kind of messed up my interview, but I think it might be okay. I asked my recruiter who to ask for, he told Bob. After that, things were reworked, times were changed. I show up at the agreed upon time and asked for Bob. I was told that Bob was not in the office; his flight was delayed. I panicked. I was given two other names but I could only remember Patti, so I asked for her. We met for an hour, realizing we both worked at the same place. It was a lovely conversation, and when it ended I was surprised that Patti was ready to turn me loose. “Aren’t I supposed to meet with someone else?” I asked. She suggested I was supposed to meet with Gordon, and immediately I knew that was the man I was to also meet with. She went to find him and return, explaining he was gone.

The next morning I called the recruiter and said I thought it went well. He called me back to say that Bob called to say I was a “no show” because Gordon waited for me to arrive. I explained what happened, how I asked for Bob, panicked and asked for Patti instead. The recruiter reviewed his emails and explained to Bob that it was his fault; he was not clear in his direction. I have felt bad about this, but actually he was not clear in his direction. I specifically asked who I should ask for, he told me Bob. When this changed, he should have explicitly stated that it did change. It just kills me to think that Gordon sat in his office and waited for me; thinking I was blowing him off. All the while, I was in their main conference room chatting away with a person it turns out I was not meant to meet quite yet. She did tell me that Bob was spoke very highly of me, but nothing can be done without Gordon’s blessing. So I am going back there on Tuesday.

We shall see.

I had free tickets to the Bulls game last week. While they weren’t on the floor, they were in the first section, nineteenth row up. Close enought to watch the players instead of the Jumbotron.  I was surprised at how overwhelming the experience was, and how the game was secondary to all the various races and trick dogs that were happening.  It still was a good time, don’t get me wrong.

Oh, and by the way, I was promoted yesterday.  I say it that way because that is kind of how it felt.  I got a congratulations and a handshake, but no money.  (Funny, they told me they weren’t able to promote me in Decemebr because they were trying to work out the money . . .)  Also, and this is really funny, we are moving our office so all our business cards have been reprinted with the new address, therefore they won’t print me new business cards until there are enough requests accumulated to warrant a second printing.  So I got a pacifier.  Or a nook, depending on what family you grew up in.

I am in a better position to get a new job, though!

I think I am living “Office Space”.  I have to credit Troy for making me consider the similarities, but now that I have, they are pretty astounding.

1. I just don’t care.  Much like Peter Gibbons, my jobs sucks.  While it took Peter a trip to the hypnotherapist to come to this realization, it only took me months and months of constant disappointment.

2.  We both have gone through “corporate restructuring”.  Unfortunately, I did not have a meeting with the Bobs but several people were downsized.

3.  We have company birthday gatherings.  Because we are food agency, there is plenty of cake to go around . . . but our meetings are just as awkward.

4.  The self-editing feature is turned off.  Like Peter when he said, “To tell you the truth, I haven’t really been missing it,” the Bobs thought he was hilarious.  When I told my boss we were pimping him, he thought I was hilarious.

5.  I am a straight-shooter with upper management written all over me.  Well, I might actually get promoted.

6.  Both involve Y2K.  Peter checked code to prevent it; today was Y2K.  It was comical really.  No one knew what time to be where.  Two client conference calls were moved around and all the meeting notifications for the next month were resent; usually for the wrong time.  All those people with stockpiles in their basement are saying, “I told you so!”

I came across a picture from my 31st birthday earlier this evening. I was blowing out the candles on an ice cream cake half decorated with Spiderman sugar candies; the other half decorated with Disney princess sugar candies. Oh, I was not alone. My four-year-old nephew and five-year-old neice are also in the picture; we are blowing out the candles together.

Since we all moved back within the same metropolitan area, my family gets together to celebrate family birthdays. We usually group birthdays together, as months like April and August tend to be more popular. Benjamin was born on the 25th of October, five days before me. In fact, his parents tried to pass him off as a my birthday present that year and I feel a special kindship to the little guy. Lydia was born September 17th and she has to wait the longest of all, as her birthday is celebrated with Benji’s and mine. In this particular picture, Lydia is in the middle of Benji and I and she is wearing a terribly tacky Mulan princess crown. It is purple and pink and has flowers and sparkles and everything little girls love. My sister-in-law and I took bets on how long she would wear it because at the time of this picture she had been wearing it daily for over a month.

Benjamin is staring intently at the cake, as is Lydia, both eyeing the sugar candies intended for them. He also has a firm double-handed grasp on a plate to ensure quick service once the candles were out. All of our lips are pursed, caught mid-blow.

I wonder what our wishes were at that moment.

I went to see my former neighbor’s new house a couple weeks ago. I arrive after church in my Sunday best, right when the new furniture was being delivered. I ended up on the floor, screwing in the couch and loveseat legs faintly remembering Sinthia asking me to come over to help . . . so why didn’t I bring a change of clothes? Her four-year-old Ian was jumping all around the couches and then hovered over me wanting to know how to help. At some point in our conversation, he asked, “Carrie, when are you moving here?” I explained that I still lived at the old place and had no plans of moving. “But all your friends are here!” he protested.

I find a certain irony in the fact that I share a birthday celebration with Benji and Lydia. My sister-in-law once said, “No offense, Carrie, but I don’t know what it is about those third children that makes them so difficult!” Lydia cries at the drop of a hat and Benjamin laughs when you punch him. But they are both independent already and that is what I love about them.

As a child things are simple. To Ian’s point, why wouldn’t I move with his family? We are friends. As you get older, things become more complicated. There will be several more pictures of Lydia, Benji and I blowing out the candles. Things will change, we will grow older but my wish is that their independence will remain.